A Word for the Weary

Today marks two weeks that my home has pretty much been in turmoil.  We are undergoing some serious changes right now and as many of you may know, change can be very uncomfortable or even painful.  I will spare you all the details, but lets just say there has been a plethora of emotions coming and going and at one point, I thought I was going to lose my mind. Change is inevitable, we all know this, but it can really get the best of us at times especially when we can't see the finish line.  Unfortunately for me, I don't get a lot of time to work through my emotions because I have to be strong for my husband.  As the leader of our household, I respect him and his decisions, so I roll with him.  What I am learning to understand as a wife is how much pressure that is for a man.  It has to be nerve-racking to have the weight of others literally on your shoulders.  We all talk a good game, but having to walk in it is a completely different story.  With this being said, I don't nag him.  I give him the freedom and space to learn and grow while in this position of leadership.  But if I'm being honest, there are times I want to take control; not only of the household, but of my life in general.

I didn't realize I was a control freak until this past week (and I despise control freaks by the way). The fact that I don't know what's going to happen when and where I'll be when it happens drives me crazy.  If any of that is confusing, then join the club.  Life is such a mystery and we're just playing along.  We don't know what will happen from day to day and I am trying to learn to be content with that.  But in order for things and God to work in our lives, we have to move out of the way.  The thought that I may have messed some things up in my life because I was impatient really breaks my heart.  Who knows if I could have been in a completely different place had I just sat still before acting out?  What progress could have been made?  While there is no point in dwelling on the past, there are lessons to be learned moving forward.  Things may not happen when or how I want them to, but I have to accept life for what it is and what it gives.  We must all learn to play with the cards we've been dealt.  True, we are taking a bet on life, but isn't that what life is all about...taking chances, being bold, truly living?  We only get one life.  Though it may have many ups, downs, and twists and turns, it's all about enjoying the ride.  Today I encourage you to just slow down and truly believe that everything is working out for your good and I'll remember to take my own advice.  Don't give up on yourself just yet.  Take a moment or two, cry if you need to and then get back up and continue living.  Really, what do you have to lose?